DADU’s CAR

DADU’s CAR

Dadu's car was his prized possession. So important was his car in life that none could coax him to part with it. He loved his car so much that he made it a point to maintain it in pinkest of her health. Dadu stays “smitten” by his prized possession – love him, or hate him – it is true to be believed to play a pivotal role in his life.

In all his strength and weaknesses, he would call out in a voice that thundered his passion for his paramour. The car too would lovingly respond to his gentle caresses and never would show any deterrence or arrogance of failure once keyed in to life. Dadu, in all his gaiety, dressed in his best armour drawn from the beautifully crafted wardrobe designed specially by Chinese carpenters, would sit behind the wheels to take control. Whizzing past many a pothole common to roads in Kolkata, speed breakers that pop up from nowhere and many an idiot on way swerving with élan on his majestic warhorse.

It would be hard to justify the attachment in a way that would diminish their bonding that they shared in common. But then, the car was growing old as days passed by and was fast catching up with Dadu. Though parting with her would never cross his mind but then, rising cost of maintenance and the fear of stalling on way would give him sleepless nights.

The most quintessential quality of all Bengalis worldwide is the gift of advice. Call it a vice, you may… readily available anywhere in all sizes, be it at home, in office, on the roads, in the tube. Not spared at the burning ghat either. You can’t “take it or leave it”. You have to take it. There is no escape. There is no respite. One day, as Dadu was among his friends, he somberly announced that he was indeed looking for a prospective buyer who would take good care of her. His voice mellowed down and head drooped bracing for the loss that he would have to bear through. As would be everyone’s guess, all around him started bombarding their piece of advice – one too many.

One of his mischievous friends came up with a novel idea! He immediately set off for the garage where the car was parked. He took good photographs of the car and posted them on a website that sells any item on earth that one wished to. Details of Dadu’s car were posted along with his contact number. This was the icing on the cake. Calls on his cellphone started pouring in. Pouring in at times when he was either in the washroom or doing some important chore. Once or twice he would reply back politely that the car was not for sale. He was totally taken unaware of this phenomenon that had made his life miserable. Neither he was able to gauge who put the advertisement on the website nor could gulp down the fact he wanted to sell off the car on a handsome bargain with lot of riders attached. At times, he even cursed them silently who called up.

One night when he was fast asleep, the phone started ringing. Feebly he enquired who the other person was on the line. The person referred to the advertisement. On hearing this, Dadu lost his cool and said, “woh gadi maine bech diya/ami garita bikri karey diyechhi” (I’ve already sold the car) and banged the set off in a fit of rage. Captain Haddock would have hung his head had he been there. The night he couldn’t sleep. Drank glass after glass of water and paced the bedroom up and down setting his think process in full throttle. Sometimes, thinking of the innocent callers who he cursed.

A smile flickered across his drawn face as he had struck eureka and went to sleep to rise afresh in the morning armed with his idea to resolve the issue once and for all. He set the clock to chime early.

The morning was dull and cloudy ruining his majestic mood to erase all his troubles. Thank God that no prospective buyer had called else, he’d have got the worst verbal thrashing of his life. He freshened up, made himself a large cup of red tea (lal cha) and switched on the laptop computer. As it booted, the first thing was to connect to the Internet and get to the website at the speed nothing short of his thought process. Happiness could not hold his eyes from lighting up when he saw that fateful advertisement.

Then what? DELETE IT…DELETE IT…! Dadu lives peacefully as of now.